5 Ways to Handle Holiday Grief

The holiday season is often associated with feelings of happiness, hopefulness, and joy. We look forward to the year ahead as we fondly remember the year that has passed.

For many, this is an exciting time of year. However, for others, it can be a time of year that increases stress, anxiety, and even depression. For those grieving the loss of a loved one, this can be a particularly challenging time of year. The holidays bring families and friends together, so the absence of someone you love can be felt more deeply. If you are dreading feeling that absence, here are 5 ways to help you handle and manage grief during the holiday season.

1. Talk About Traditions 

It’s important to discuss with those around you which traditions you want to keep and which ones are too painful to continue. It doesn’t have to be a permanent change, but giving yourself the space and grace to make adjustments can ease grief.

Let those around you know that you need time before returning to those traditions. It could be not serving a dish your loved one used to make or skipping a holiday outing. However, if there’s a way you want to honor your loved one in a new way, talk with your family about incorporating the memorial into your plans. Allow yourself the space to adjust and grieve as you need.

2. Find Ways to Honor Your Loved One

As mentioned above, finding ways to honor your loved one during the holiday season can be healing. Some ways to do this are:

  • Lighting a candle in memory of that person

  • Share a memory or funny story with your family 

  • Find a project they didn’t complete and finish it on their behalf

  • Name a star after them

photo of a red candle with holiday decor surrounding it on a table

3. Don’t Feel Guilty About Skipping Events

The holidays can already be overwhelming without adding the feeling of loss and grief. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, allow yourself to skip events. We all have different capacities, and there is no need to feel guilty if your grief is too heavy to go out. Conversely, if you are feeling stifled at home, going on a drive alone can help you clear your head and give you some much-needed respite. 

4. Take a Trip Down Memory Lane

Take a trip down memory lane by looking at photos from past holidays and reminiscing on previous holidays with your loved one. Remember, it’s okay to feel sad when doing this. However, you might also find unexpected joy in remembering special times with your loved one. You can also play music they loved or bake their favorite cookies. Try to do those things that make you feel connected to them. 

5. Be Willing to Ask for Help

Regardless of when you lost your loved one, the holidays are always more difficult because the loss of their presence is profoundly felt. If you are noticing your grief increasing as you enter the holiday season, it is okay to seek help. Seek support in your friends and family or even online forums for those who are grieving.

If you don’t feel like you can talk about your grief with those around you, you can ask for help in other ways. Ask others for help with holiday tasks, including decorating, meal prep, or clean up. This can help lighten your load.

Additionally, speaking with a healthcare professional can help you with your grief. If you feel guilty talking to your friends or family about what you’re experiencing, a licensed therapist can help you navigate your emotions. The holidays are a difficult time of year for grief, but you don’t have to go it alone. Reach out today to make your first appointment for grief counseling.

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